Being Who You Truly Are — And What Your Nervous System Has to Do With It
Originally shared with my Soulful Inspirations community — You’re warmly welcome to join us here
What does it really mean to “be who you truly are”?
Do you feel at choice inside your own experience — free to express, respond, and live from the truth of who you are?
For many of us, this isn’t something we can simply decide with the mind, even though that is what we’ve been taught. Think differently. Choose differently. Be different.
But our inner world doesn’t work that way.
Your subconscious patterns — and most of all, your nervous system — play a central role in whether you can access who you truly are. These deeper layers operate outside of rational awareness and beyond what you can control with thought alone.
Today, I want to gently zoom in on the autonomic nervous system, because understanding this part of yourself can create an inner choice, freedom, and self-connection that doesn’t arise from effort — but from safety.
Why your autonomic nervous system matters
Your autonomic nervous system (ANS) is like your internal operating system.
It sits at the foundation of your human experience, and its primary job is simple and profound: to keep you safe and alive.
When your nervous system feels safe, your whole being opens.
You can access your:
⟡ creativity
⟡ intuition
⟡ authentic self-expression
⟡ emotional clarity
⟡ sense of possibility
⟡ spiritual sensitivity
⟡ deeper presence
Safety makes space for your soul to breathe.
But the ANS can also become shaped by old protective patterns — past experiences, early environments, ancestral threads — that taught your system what “safety” meant then. Even if those patterns no longer serve you today, your body may still cling to them because they were once protective.
This is why change can feel so difficult, even when you want it deeply.
Your biology may still be orienting toward what was once familiar, and therefore “safe.”
Being at choice is a body state, not a mind state
When people say “just choose differently,” they’re speaking to the mind.
But choice — real, embodied choice — doesn’t come from thought. It emerges when your nervous system feels safe enough to let your deeper self lead.
Being at choice inside means your system is regulated enough to allow:
⟡ clarity
⟡ truth
⟡ presence
⟡ emotional spaciousness
⟡ authentic expression
When your ANS is bracing, overwhelmed, or stuck in survival patterns, your true self becomes harder to access — not because anything is wrong with you, but because your biology is doing its job: keeping you alive in the ways it learned long ago.
This is why nervous system work is not about “fixing” anything.
It’s about helping your system update its patterns so it no longer needs to rely on old forms of protection.
Imagine your nervous system as a wild, sensitive animal
A helpful way to understand this is to imagine your nervous system as a sensitive, beautiful wild animal living inside you. You cannot convince it with logic. It does not understand: “Relax, everything is fine now.”
But it does understand:
⟡ tone of voice
⟡ breath
⟡ touch
⟡ movement
⟡ sensory cues
⟡ environment
⟡ presence
⟡ connection
It responds to what it senses, not what you think.
Showing your nervous system that it is safe — through your senses, your breath, and your body — is how real change begins.
Updating the signals you send your body
Around 80% of the communication in your autonomic nervous system flows from the body to the brain, not the other way around. This means that when you want to shift your inner experience, a helpful place to begin is with the body itself — giving it new cues of safety.
Here are a few gentle ways to begin re-attuning your system:
⟡ Body-to-body dialoguing
Notice a sensation in your body and respond with a small, intuitive movement from another part.
Let the body speak to itself.
⟡ Let your eyes soften and wander
Gaze slowly around the space you’re in. Let your attention land gently on colours, textures, and small details.
For video calls: shift your visual focus now and then — look out the window, across the room, or toward something comforting.
⟡ Use sound intentionally
Music can support your system to soften and settle into “safe enough” energy.
I personally love frequency music and soft nature sounds.
⟡ Lengthen your exhale
Take a slow breath in, then let your exhale be longer than your inhale.
This gently signals safety to the vagus nerve.
⟡ Cultivate an inner observer
Notice the temperature on your skin, your feet on the ground, the movement of your breath, any tight or soft areas, and the feelings present.
⟡ Be present with what you notice
If you sense tension, heaviness, or activation, meet it with presence rather than pressure.
Offer it a gentle new cue from the present moment — a stretch, a yawn, a slow look around, a tiny shift in posture.
⟡ Create sacred space
Your nervous system responds deeply to your environment.
Light a candle, open a window, soften the lighting, place something beautiful nearby. Let the atmosphere become a gentle signal of safety — a quiet invitation for your body to arrive, settle, and breathe.
Creating sacred space isn’t just about ritual; it can also be about creating an environment your system can trust.
Let these practices be small, gentle, and woven into your day. Remember, what works for you will be unique to you and your nervous system — give yourself permission to explore, to follow what feels good, and to let your body guide you. This is how your nervous system begins to understand: things are different now.
Being Who You Truly Are Begins with Inner Safety
The more regulated your system becomes, the easier it is to reconnect with your intuitive truth, your creativity, your voice, your soul.
This isn’t about becoming someone new.
It’s about returning to who you’ve always been beneath the bracing, beneath the conditioning, beneath the patterns your system once needed for protection.
When your inner world feels safe enough, your outer world begins to shift naturally.
Coming Home Through the Body
Your nervous system is an integral part of your body, and it’s not separate from your soul.
It shapes how you sense the world, how you attune, how you remember, how you belong, and how you communicate with the world and with your inner essence.
When you tend to your nervous system gently and in your own rhythm, you create space for your truest self to emerge.
You step into deeper connection — with yourself, with others, with the earth, and with the wider field you come from.
And life begins to unfold from the inside out.
If you’d like to explore this topic more deeply, here are a few places you might enjoy:
If this resonates and you’d like to dive more deeply into your nervous system, you may enjoy:
⟡ Your Nervous System Is a Portal to Your Soul
A gentle reflection on how the nervous system connects body, soul, and ancestral memory.
For more in-depth educational explorations of the nervous system:
⟡ Coming Home to Your Nervous System — Why it Makes Sense to Work With the Vagus Nerve
A clear, compassionate introduction to the vagus nerve and why it plays such a central role in wellbeing and inner connection.
⟡ The Missing Piece: Why Your Nervous System is Key to Lasting Transformation
A foundational look at the autonomic nervous system and how it influences your patterns, safety, inner growth, and capacity for change.
More about the Safe and Sound Protocol: music that gently helps you restore balance in your nervous system:
⟡ What is the Safe and Sound Protocol — and how can it support your inner journey?
A gentle, research-backed listening programme designed to help your nervous system shift into a state of inner safety. Created by Dr. Stephen Porges, a renowned neuroscientist and founder of Polyvagal Theory, the SSP is used around the world to support emotional regulation, resilience, and a deeper sense of connection.
More about my Nervous System Programme (can includes the Safe and Sound Protocol):
⟡ Nervous System Coaching with the Safe and Sound Protocol
A soft, grounded overview of my 1:1 nervous system support — blending the SSP, somatic practices, and intuitive guidance.
(Includes a short video introduction)
Trauma-informed intuitive guide and soulful embodiment coach with a background rooted in science and spirit.
Your energy and presence are gifts to share with the world — even if they are deeply quiet. They are the very fuel that helps you transform your life and truly flourish.
You can tap into this when you ground in the essence of being you.
That’s what this blog is here to hold: reflections from my own long journey home to myself, interwoven with the insights I’ve gained through years of lived experience and training.